So an update with me.
My parents kicked me out again, I believe I'm not moving back no matter what this time, I broke up with my boyfriend - mostly because he is a complete dumbass and it took me way too long to realize that.
Uuuuhm...I'm working on posting a video... hopefully I can post a lot more videos soon...but it's going to take some time especially since I'm sleeping on peoples couches presently until I can get a job.
But that's life. Thank god I have good friends.
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Friday, February 6, 2009
Shiney New Day
It's a shiney new day, kinda rough on the eyes, but good for your heart I suppose.
Fixed things with my best friend, back together with my boyfriend, and life is pretty damn good.
Well except for the part where I don't have a job...but I'm working on that.
Fixed things with my best friend, back together with my boyfriend, and life is pretty damn good.
Well except for the part where I don't have a job...but I'm working on that.
Saturday, January 31, 2009
A Hazy Day
Have you ever had a day where everything was hazy, not quite there.
I am sad today I find. It is a slump prehaps. Though admittedly I have reason for sadness today.
I find sad is better than depressed in many ways, though it is just as hazy - I am not numb. I feel.
And while what I am feeling today is sadness, it is a blessing in someways, because it is something.
I feel something.
I look at the world today, and it is beautiful and silent, undisturbed; it's as though I have a lens over my eyes brushing away all distrubances - all mars on this perfect vision.
It is so beautiful, it is cry worthy.
I do need people, like anyone else, but at times I wish that should I go outside, I'd find only a forest.
Yes, a beautiful forest with a whispering brook, it's trying to get my attention, and if I learn to listen close enough I can learn the secrets that I've been searching for my entire life.
To drift into something so perfect, to dream of my perfect place, it is taunting.
I sit here at this desk, and I dream of somewhere without pain, people, effort.
Such a place does not exsist.
To Any Of My You Tube Veiwers: I'm sure if you've read this you'll realize that while writing I am given to dramatics, but I find I am also much more eloquent...and also slightly...nonsensical. I tend to trail off, but thank you for taking a look.
I am sad today I find. It is a slump prehaps. Though admittedly I have reason for sadness today.
I find sad is better than depressed in many ways, though it is just as hazy - I am not numb. I feel.
And while what I am feeling today is sadness, it is a blessing in someways, because it is something.
I feel something.
I look at the world today, and it is beautiful and silent, undisturbed; it's as though I have a lens over my eyes brushing away all distrubances - all mars on this perfect vision.
It is so beautiful, it is cry worthy.
I do need people, like anyone else, but at times I wish that should I go outside, I'd find only a forest.
Yes, a beautiful forest with a whispering brook, it's trying to get my attention, and if I learn to listen close enough I can learn the secrets that I've been searching for my entire life.
To drift into something so perfect, to dream of my perfect place, it is taunting.
I sit here at this desk, and I dream of somewhere without pain, people, effort.
Such a place does not exsist.
To Any Of My You Tube Veiwers: I'm sure if you've read this you'll realize that while writing I am given to dramatics, but I find I am also much more eloquent...and also slightly...nonsensical. I tend to trail off, but thank you for taking a look.
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